Buddha said it best: Suffering is created by want, if you want, you will suffer (thats a paraphrase). If you want love, be prepared to suffer. Rejection is the worst feeling in the world; well technically its despondence, but despondence is caused most frequently by rejection than any other situation. Despondence is that combination of the feelings of hopelessness, loneliness, depression, worthlessness, and that absolutely horrible feeling in your chest. Nothing you can do will ever allow you to skip this feeling after being rejected by someone you actually care about. However you can shorten it if you realize a few things:
- That person cant help the fact they don’t feel the same way as you, just like the fact you cant help the way you feel about them.
- Realize that person just saved you from a relationship with someone who didn’t like you. Would you want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t like you?
- Move on, stop thinking about them. Play a few videogames.
- This isn’t the end, you will fall for another.
- In my personal experience, the next person is always better than the one who last rejected you. You may think that the person you just got rejected by was pure gold, but the next person will be platinum.
When i fall, i fall hard…EVERY TIME. I truely cared about every girl ive asked out. Its a weird emotion to explain, but its a kinda happy feeling in the pit of your stomach and a very strong urge to make them happy. When i finally gather the courage to ask her out, she says “no”, “lets be friends”, “maybe next week” or some other overused cleche’. Anyway, i feel despondent for a bit then remember: I felt incredible around her, she made me feel completely happy, BUT i didnt make her feel that way and there was nothing i could do to change that, she just didnt feel it. Why would i want her to not have that feeling, should i really be so selfish as to not have that beautiful feeling shared? Food for thought.
Also- side note on the friend zone. You are never really friend zoned UNLESS you both decide to not be in a relationship in fear that it would ruin it. “lets be friends” is not being friendzoned. If they actually like you back they will say yes to you asking them out. Women, guys dont (most of us anyways) become friends to sleep with you. And believe it or not, not everything we do is predecided. Maybe we become friends and then we fall for you on accident. Sometimes we are interested in you from the start, but made a misstep or didnt flirt too obviously, and ended up as friends instead of a couple. that was just a rant i felt the need to go on, im tired of people saying they were friend zoned…
I hope in some way ive enlightened you to my ideas of love and that my advice sprinkled in there helps you a little bit. I have little ‘first hand’ experience with love, but ive observed a lot of my friends’ relationships and constantly think about the subject in hopes of finally obtaining it myself. I may or may not add on to this. Feel free to comment on any section of this. Love isn’t dead, it is just hard to find. Even if the light at the end of the tunnel always seems to be a fluorescent bulb, remember that those fluorescent bulbs will eventually lead you to your final destination; the light at the end of the tunnel. You do me a favor: Have a good day!