Monthly Archives: December 2013

Evil?

Ive been reading this book about the ideas of happiness, morality, and alot of other psychological ideas. It started talking about the existence of evil and i figured id share them with you, i find them pretty interesting and the author seems to defend them well:


-God is all powerful and all good; either he allows evil to flourish ( which means he is not all good), or he struggles against evil (which means he is not all powerful)
– to defend this the argument is given that there is a good and bad force that fight eternally 
-however there is one more path, monism. There is one god and evil is an illusion and enlightenment is obtained by breaking free of that illusion 

– in the same chapter the author notes that everyone views themselves as the protagonist (for lack of a better word), Take gun rights for instance (not from the book so the example may be sloppy): One person believes that guns are a right (good) and that the other side wants to take them away (evil); conversely, One person believes that guns should be banned (good) and that the other side just wants people dead (evil).
– both sides have virtuous reasoning but still view the other side as evil. “

Food for Thought….Image

Short Stories of the Broken Hearts ( My first short story)

 

I.

This is the end. His wife is dead, the only person in his life who mattered to him. This was it. He was stuck in the back of a cop car, handcuffed, waiting for it all to end, and staring out the window looking back

Keith Rogers wanted to make her happy. She wanted excitement. Neither of them were good people. She had robbed banks and he was a hit man. Last time he checked theft and murder weren’t on the list of virtues that got you into Heaven. However, he did fall in love. Odd. Two criminals falling in love, isn’t that a funny thing. He remembered her star shaped birth mark on her neck, how she accepted his flaws, how she looked at him, and how he looked at her.

He had saved some money; he wanted to retire. He wanted her to retire. He talked to her and she agreed but on one condition: One more bank, the two of them. He decided he’d go with her on her last heist; however, he didn’t think it would end like this.

They had gone into the bank, everything a success. They had gotten in, held up the tellers and even had the money in hand. Then they showed up.

Three men. All better built and stronger than he. The men wanted that money, but he owed this to her- he wouldn’t back down. The three men asked for the money again and raised their guns this time. Now the sirens had shown up; the police were here. They were in a stand-off: The three new robbers, he and his wife, and the police. Keith and his wife were in the middle. And that’s when it happened.

A bullet tore through the shorter of the three men, causing his gun to go off. The other two, startled, started firing as well. Then the cops did the same. One of the stray bullets hit his wife in the shoulder. He shouted. All the while bullets kill the other robbers. He ran over to her and looked into her eyes. He begged her to stay alive, but she couldn’t. With her last breath she whispered “I love you”. He said it back, but it was too late; she was dead.

“Rogers, time to go” an armed guard said.

He walked to his end. Thinking all of his thoughts. All of his thoughts about her. Her laugh, her smile, the birthmark on her forehead and that look of determination every time she robbed a bank.

It has been said that the walk to your death is the longest walk you will ever take. His seemed too short. He still had a lot to think about, a lot to remember. As he sat down in the chair, he let his final thoughts race through; thoughts of her.

They had pulled the lever, but it wasn’t an instant death as he had thought. The second seemed to last forever. Just as he was about to be electrocuted, a tear ran down his face as he mouthed the word “Sarah”.

II.

Lucy was an orphan. The only thing she desired was to be loved. People wouldn’t adopt her because she had cancer and they would have to cover the medical expenses. Luckily, Old Springs Orphanage could afford the chemotherapy. After her realization that she will probably never be adopted, she had decided to go after a different kind of love: the kind she read in books, the kind of romance.

It was not long after she found this to be just as futile. The boys she knew judged her harshly. How could they find a bald girl with a weird birthmark attractive? She decided she wasn’t worth loving, so she gave up on it. Then he showed up.

Michael was a nice, shy boy. His parents had done terrible things and got put in jail. He had no other family so he was sent here. He always kept to himself. While the other kids were having snowball fights, he sat on his usual bench and watched. Lucy was curious about this guy. She went up and talked to him, asked him why he sat by himself. He answered. She saw it all come out. She saw a boy that had been tortured more than even a man should be. A boy who was abused and neglected, a boy who didn’t feel like he should have friends. They deserved better than him. But countlessly, Lucy saw this boy give more of himself in one situation than most people gave their entire lives. Lucy and Michael became friends.

It was that summer Lucy had become aware of her feelings. She couldn’t imagine a day without him. He was the missing part of her life that she had always longed for. Even though she was only sixteen, she knew this was love. As they swam in the pool she noticed the birthmark on his shoulder and knew, in some way, that they were connected.

How could she tell him though? What if this ruins their friendship? Questions of the sort ran through her mind. Months came and went, but these questions never did. She kept on recalling her failures with the other boys. She didn’t want Michael to leave like all the other boys did, who never talked to her again, who forgot her….

She wanted the thoughts to end! Every time she saw Michael, her insecurities came to life. How could he not see her flaws?! Why would he like her?! Is he just being nice by being friends, does he really just pity her?! Does he pity cancer girl?! She knew it was time to end it; an eternity in hell would be better then another hundred years of this torture!

This was the last time she would ever see snow, she realized as she was tying the last knot. She stared at the frost on the window and wrote two words: GOODBYE MICHAEL. She got on the stool. She thought about Michael; she wanted her last thought to be of him. A good thought. Lucy placed the noose around her neck and plunged to her death.

As this happened, the door opened. Michael stared in shock and dropped the tulip had had picked for Lucy onto the wooden floor. Tonight was the night he would tell her he loved her, but it was too late. He cut her down and held her in his arms all night as he cried.

Michael never married, never fell in love again. He kept the memory of her alive and visited her grave three times a year: Her birthday, Valentine’s Day, and that night he found out that she had loved him as much as he loved her. He had loved her until his untimely death. His broken heart had ultimately killed him when he visited her grave on what would be her twenty-third birthday.

III.

Strauss was a German man who had sided with the Allies during the second world war. At just twenty-six, Strauss had helped many platoons free captured forces at six different internment camps. However, after Normandy, Strauss decided to see if he could have a less dangerous post. His request was granted. Now stationed at a small warehouse as a guard. Once he was done his post each night, he would hit the nearby town.

Strauss went to the bars, went dancing, and walked around the town. Although he was shallow at times, Strauss was a romantic. If he met any women downtown he would show them the time of their lives. One got a romantic dinner by the river, another a dozen roses and an evening under the stars. Evelyn was different.

Evelyn had flowing black hair, teal blue eyes, a beauty mark above her lips, and a  cute birthmark on her neck. She was a teacher at the nearby school. The daring and adventurous type who knew all the cool places in the country. She did have one flaw at first; She didn’t like Strauss.

Strauss felt drawn toward her when they first met. He was on his way home from his post, when he saw this woman fall. He tried to help her up, he offered his hand. She just looked at him and got up by herself. He had never seen this look before; one of distrust, absolute loneliness, and despair. He wanted to make sure she never had that look ever again.

He started pursuing her: flowers on her door step, love letters, and romantic invitations. She never accepted, replied, or went. He finally just went to her house and tried to talk to her in person. He knocked and she came to the door. Before he could say a word, she started yelling at him. She knows his types, the ones who pretend to be romantics just to lie with a woman. She told him to leave, to never come around her again, as she slammed the door. Strauss was heartbroken.

A year passed and Strauss had forgotten about Evelyn, he had given up on women after that incident. He had befriended a little American boy, Sam, one of the sons of the other soldiers. Sam’s mother died at birth, so he had to move with his dad to the various military bases. Strauss tried to help Sam’s father out by looking after him while his dad was out. Eventually Sam’s father never came back. He got killed while moving a cargo truck through Poland. Strauss tried his best to be a guardian for Sam. He put the boy into the school, helped him with homework, and even left the military to be there for Sam.

Sam was now entering the seventh grade and to Strauss’s surprise had several new teachers, including one Evelyn Page. Strauss realized he had a second chance. He had a plan.

Sam had to turn in an essay for her writing class. Strauss asked Sam to turn in an extra letter with his essay, Evelyn would surely read it. As she graded papers she noticed something different, one of the essays was written in cursive. She read it:

Dear Evelyn,

The night I first saw you fall, I saw an incomprehensible pain in your eyes. I want to be the person who ends that pain, to make sure it never happens again. I have been shallow in my life, I’ve loved for the wrong reasons, this is neither. I have an inherent need to end your suffering, and I feel the only way I can do so is to be the romantic that you undoubtedly distrust. I’m asking for one chance to prove my self. Let me take you out to see the fireworks this weekend. If you like it we can do it again. If not, I will leave you alone. Think about it.

                                                Sincerely,

                                                          Strauss

She looked the letter over and two days later, got Sam to tell Strauss that she had agreed.

The night had come. Strauss had treated her to dinner and she seemed to be enjoying herself. Then they went by the river to watch the fireworks. They were truly beautiful. Evelyn looked happy, she looked like she had faith. They entered the river.

Evelyn noticed the birthmark on his chest.

Strauss jokingly said “ I was hurt in a past life”

“Oh Really?” Evelyn said playfully

“ Ha, I don’t know. It’s said that birthmarks are connections to past lives; lives that we’ve lived but don’t remember. Because my birthmark is over my heart, it would be said that my ‘past-self’ had been hurt really badly, lost a loved one maybe. It would explain my insatiable hunger for romanticism. Trying to make up for my past self’s pain.”

“That’s interesting” Evelyn stated.

Strauss continued, “ Your birthmark goes partly around your neck like a crescent moon. Your ‘past self’ may have been strangled, murdered, or executed. Maybe even an accident working on machinery”

“ I think your forgetting that women don’t deal much with machinery, especially forty years ago” Evelyn challenged

“Actually, gender doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. I could be a man now, but I could have been a woman in the past two lives I’ve lived. You may be a girl now, a girl in your next life and a man after that. It continuously changes.”

Evelyn started “ that’s an amazingly intriguing idea.” she paused  “Strauss, do you believe in soul m-”

Bombs interrupted. The fireworks had turned into Nazi fighters armed with bombs. They got dressed and fled to a nearby shed. The sounds of crashing bombs, launching shells, and aircraft engines filled the air. They knew this was it.

Evelyn said “ Thank you Strauss, for making me believe in romance again. I know its terribly sudden, but if this is it I want you to know something: I love you”

He hugged her as tight as he could and she, him. A bomb crashed into the shed, where the two died in each others arms.

IV.

The blacks had gotten rights, the women had just gotten rights, everyone was equal now, right? Wrong. Julia was a normal girl except for the fact that she likes girls. She got treated like absolute crap because of this. Besides the name calling and bullying, she couldn’t stand the fact that nobody could look at her relationships without thinking only about the idea of two girls having sex.

She loved Kristen with all of her heart. Aside from her physical beauty, Kristen complemented Julia well. Both loved the arts, were true romantics, and even had birthmarks that matched up when you put their arms together. Kristen helped bring out traits Julia never knew she had. They loved each other.

However, nobody else seemed to grasp this concept. Their love was an “atrocity”. This is why Julia was glad she met Kristen. Kristen was an poster girl for the gay movement. Julia wanted to help her cause, their cause. She wanted this not only for them but for also Eric and Robert, who were getting treated worse than the lesbians. All four of them had finally worked hard for and gotten their big break. They were scheduled to do speeches in California that will be aired state wide.

When the four of them finally crossed state lines, that’s when the trouble started to happen. They stopped in a hotel but were rejected because they didn’t fit the hotel‘s values. So the four of them decided to camp out in the van. Somehow a person noticed Kristen as the spokes person and started screaming vulgarity. A few others began to join in, throwing rocks and whatever they could find at the van. Robert started the van and started to drive off.

Some of the vandals decided to pursue the van and continue harassing it. The car chase dragged on and eventually six cars were chasing the van. Somebody managed to hit the tire of the van. It crashed.

Everyone inside was thrown around. Eric was badly injured and Robert was holding him reassuring him that everything will be ok. You could tell he was trying to reassure himself more than Eric, he had tears streaming down his face.

Julia and Kristen tried to get the doors open so they all four could escape before the people in the cars try to kill them; however, the doors were broken and wouldn’t open.

One of the vandals started pouring gasoline on the van. The crowd circling the van cheered him on and yelled obscenities at the four unfortunates.

Julia and Kristen, realizing this was their end, tried to focus on each other. As someone lit the gasoline. As the gasoline ignited. They remembered their first kiss together, their first date, everything that mattered to them. They stared into one another’s eyes, hoping to find safety; hoping that the outside world would disappear. And it did

As the van exploded, Julia and Kristen were too lost in each other to notice.

V.

It was 2055 and Avon had seen everything. He saw the end of fuel dependency, the first space colonization, and even the first robots. A lot of it amazed the 79 year old man, but he saw the bad too. The loss of family values, the division of fellow countrymen, and he saw the idea of romance wither away like dust. He had hoped that he would bring that idea back to life; that someone could look at his life and be envious of the love he and his wife had shared. However this could not be the case. Avon had never loved, nor been loved. The terrible romantic, that he was, often scared off the women of his time. They enjoyed the idea of romanticism, but felt safer with their shallower lives that they lead. Avon noticed this and just gave up.

He lived by himself in a gated neighborhood. He never had gotten to know any neighbors until a nice lady moved in next door. She was older, like him, but somehow had the spirit of a 30 year old. She said hi to him as he was getting his mail. He shyly responded back briefly, then returned to his house. A few days later she had knocked on his door. He answered. He let her in and they began to talk. The shy old man soon became open and felt familiar with this woman. As they got to know each other, the man felt like he had already met this woman. They met a few other times and became close.

Eventually, Avon asked why Avila seemed so familiar. She said that they had been in love once before the accident he had. Although he remembered the accident and many events before it, he had forgotten about her. When she first found this out, she got scared and ran away to never see him again until now. She had tried her hardest to forget him, but never could. The thing that struck her when she first saw him at the mailbox, he was still wearing his wedding ring that she gave him. Then she went inside of his house to find that he had some of her old paintings she made for him while she was in art school. It was like his subconscious was trying to tell him that he loved her. After stating this, she emotionally kissed him, tears rolling down her face.

He remembered. He remembered everything. That time where he took her to see the grand canyon and painted together, The time they figured out they had exact same birthmarks over their hearts, The times they took care of each other in pain. He remembered.

Avila had brought him happiness he thought he would never see. They became close and eventually renewed their wedding vows from over 50 years ago. They traveled around the world together, even to the colony on the moon.

Time did slow down for the two. Ten years back together on their way home from Tasmania, they rented a hotel. Just before bed, the two lie in bed staring as newlyweds do, telling I love you to one another. Laying in their arms they go to sleep in happiness as they had done since they had gotten back together. They never woke up, but this was just the beginning.

Getting Rid of the Pain of Rejection

Introduction

                For many who know me personally, know that i am a die-hard romantic. The old fashion roses, walk under the stars, drum-roll kiss kinda guy. Im not ashamed of it, in fact im very proud of the fact that im one of the few who is trying to keep romanticism alive. However, i seldom do find romance. Hopeless romantics are born from situations of pain and rejection. I would like to refrain from the actual number, but i have been rejected a lot of times. Personally, i fall really hard for each of these women, stay attached for a few months, finally gather the courage to express my feelings, then i (usually) get rejected. I will say that being a romantic is a tough and long road. For those who are terribly emotional and romantics (which are two traits usually tied to one another), despondence will arrive. That’s the heart-wrenching feelings of loneliness, hopelessness, depression, and despair. Fear not, this is not about my personal experiences of pain; instead, this is written to give hope for those like me- the fellow 20 + year olds who know not of true romance and are prepared to face the immense pain of trying to find it. I plan to help you so you dull that pain just a little.

Why Be a Romantic?

                Well for starters who really hates romantics besides the real cynical types? Romantics give others hope. I have a few friends who are fellow romantics and they have helped me believe that true love is possible, because of the relationships they have shared with others. Romantics are kinda like little kids that believe in Santa: Even though he may not be real, the idea of him is strong enough to keep them happy. Happiness spreads like wildfire. Have you ever been sad around someone who is absolutely ecstatic? Even those terribly hurt give hope and bring light to other’s lives.

Love is a beautiful thing, but romantics make it better. Normal dates are cool and you need them so that the romantic ones seem so much better; If every night is a romantic one, none of them seem romantic. That being said romantics can make the big nights even bigger. Normal ‘romantic’ date: candle-lit dinner. The Romantic’s ‘romantic’ date: A walk downtown, a special dinner, something that interests her, then ending the night by having her open your glove box to find a rose that you hid there for the date (your welcome fellas). The difference between the two is not just the length and effort, but the fact that you make it about her (or him). You talk about what she likes on your walk; you take her to her favorite restaurant, take her to someplace special that you know she will like (maybe a park if she’s a nature loving type, or laser tag if she’s the more adventure loving type).

I believe anyone can find love, even two criminals. Love is something formed by the connections we make with others. As long as people are intimate (share each other’s thoughts), passionate (show each other’s feelings), give to one another, accept each other’s folly, and reciprocate each other’s feelings; they can find love. Although I believe love between any two people is possible, only ‘true love’ is possible between two romantics. Imagine two people who give completely to one another, accept them as they are, and are completely open with each other. That’s my idea of ‘true love’.

Not everyone has to, can, and should be a romantic. Love isn’t at the top of everyone’s list. Sometimes the suffering is too much, depending on your sensitivity and how you view things, despondence can be too much. Just don’t expect a romance if you don’t try at it.

Helping to Stop Feeling Despondent

You will be rejected sometime. Maybe even many times. It will hurt, it will always hurt. How long depends on you. This isnt even for just the romantics, some take rejection/splitting up hard. Romantics though take it hard most of the time. Ive found several ways to help this go away and how to move on.
Find another fish:

Ive been so lucky this far to find that after every person ive been rejected by, that the next person seems even better in all aspects. Im not saying find a girl/guy and have a one night stand. This will dull the pain, for one night. Then you’ll feel hollow after realizing that you are still without someone. What im saying is to stop making everything about that person you are currently after. Make it about someone else. Give them what you couldn’t give the person who rejected you.

Make it about you:

Everyone has hobbies and dreams. Personally, my big goals in life: Be in love, Become a musician, Become a videogame designer, Become a psychologist. My hobbies: drums, music, writing, making art. To sorta quote somebody “whenever I start feeling lonely, I stop feeling lonely and be awesome instead”. I will play on my drums, listen to music, write, or focus on my other goals in life. It gets your mind off of everything.

See their perspective:

                It’s not your fault they don’t feel the same way, or theirs. That feeling that you have towards them, that feeling you cant control or get rid of currently, is the same feeling that they cant get or manufacture for you. It’s not this way for true love but for infatuation, the judgement is immediate. I contend that just like art and music, in which you immediately decide whether or not you like it, your decision of liking someone is controlled by your autonomic system (the one that’s automatic and you don’t think about). What actually makes this worse is the fact that you will actually fabricate reasons at the same time. You don’t know why you like that song or painting, but you will fabricate because it’s the mood or color; however, other songs and paintings with similar features will be deemed bad. There is no logical reason why you like those songs, paintings, or find that person attractive. There is no logical reason why that person cant find you attractive

Change the way you think:

Ill never find anyone who loves me, im ugly, whats wrong with me, these questions frequent the despondent. First, notice these negative thoughts, then change them. Realize that love is hard for everyone. Do you realize how magical and difficult it must be to find someone who can completely accept you and your flaws and be accepted with theirs? Just notice how that person saved you by rejecting you. You want love, they cant give you love, that relationship was bound to fail anyways. Why would you want someone who doesn’t love you? You are now free to look for your soul-mate in the time being in a destined-to-fail relationship, would have taken.

Beauty is subjective, everyone’s idea is different. What you think is beautiful and what I think are completely different. Fun fact: if you are a girl reading this and you think some guy is hot, I can guarantee I will not find him attractive. In my opinion physical beauty of others is actually determined by how one looks. If one has big ears, small nose, and blue eyes, then others with those same features will be deemed more attractive than ones with different traits. I feel as if attractiveness is determined by the features we are exposed to the most. If you ever notice couples that look alike this is why. Even in times before the mirror, I hypothesize; people would find others that had the same features as their parents subconsciously (because parents are the people we see the most, other than ourselves).

If love was taken away from you, know that: 1. It wasn’t meant to be. If love was taken away then there is some reason; one partner or the other fell out of love and now it’s not love. Either move on or try to rekindle the love that was once there. 2. At least you had it while it lasted. Some have never had it (like yours truly, yet). You can prove it exists; you have confidence that you can find it. Even I find it hard to believe that it exists sometimes. Luckily, I have really close friends that support and help me believe in such a hard to find idea!

“Nothing is miserable unless you think it so….” – Buddha

Conclusion

                I honestly hope I have helped you in some way. Romance is a hard path to tread. I hope that ive given you enough supplies to help walk the path. I will leave you with one last tidbit of knowledge: Even if it seems you are given hope, then have it taken away, know that it will be what carries you to your final destination. The flying squirrel cannot ‘fly’ from one forest to another; it must glide from tree to tree. It needs those trees to keep it up, to help it stay on its path. If none of the trees were there, the squirrel would fall to the ground.

Act V lyrics

These are lyrics i wrote for my band, named Act V:

Shy as he could be

Courage gathering

Putting First love to the test

Wondering will she say yes?

She rejects him for another

He then wonders why bother

He will forget her

(and)go onto another

Love is price less

he is love less

She says love has been dead

she goes for hot in stead

Sights on the heart

right from the start

Romeo is dead and…

JULIET KILLED HIM

A few years have passed

and many-a romance

Many of his successes

Turn out to be meaningless

No couples hearts are pounding

But Instead just breath panting

No eternity

but Just once nightly

Love is price less

he is love less

She says love has been dead

she goes for hot in stead

Sights on the heart

right from the start

Romeo is dead and…

JULIET KILLED HIM

Married late in life

and with no forsight

Happiness for him so short

She cheated, man of the sort

Many striking looks has he

Personality not many

His heart now broken

Divorce has happend

Love is price less

he is love less

She says love has been dead

she goes for hot in stead

Sights on the heart

right from the start

Romeo is dead and…

JULIET KILLED HIM

Marriage number two

Still she can fool you

Next to you she is very young

Towards you no affection

as you reach for one more hug

She has already pulled the plug

No, not for mercy

But for your money

Love is price less

he is love less

She says love has been dead

she goes for hot in stead

Sights on the heart

right from the start

Romeo is dead and…

JULIET KILLED HIM

You should not feel sorry for this one soul

He is finally at piece

Unlike many others he paid his toll

His chest a literal abyss

His heart although has never been so whole

With his final Fiancee

Personal Notes On Lucid Dreaming

  • Dreams give gratification to one’s primal, societal, and suppressed desires:
    • Primal:
      • Going to bed hungry will make you dream of eating lots of food
      • Being dehydrated will lead one to dream of drinking large amounts of water
    • Societal:
      • Dreams about career. Ie being a journalist in you dreams
      • Dreams about romance.
      • Dreams about large amounts of money and spending it
    • Suppressed:
      • Anger (dreams of yelling at object of anger)
      • Sadness  (crying in dreams)
  • Several stages of lucidity
    • Not lucid: dreamer is unaware they are dreaming; However, they can refocus the dream when it starts to fade-Only if the dreamer has made this ability innate.
    • Low Lucidity: Dreamer is aware they are dreaming. But can only observe, not lucid enough to realize they can change the dream.
    • Lucidity: Dreamer is aware they are dreaming, can alter some characteristics such as dream characters. Can alter one’s ‘powers’. Can participate with characters in an active manner (such as how people talk IRL)
    • High Lucidity: Same as Lucidity. But person is aware enough to interact with landscapes and change environment. Scenes are vivid- more that life-like.
  • Ways to achieve lucidity:
    • Binaural/isochronic Beats
      • Focus on the sounds while sleeping; will create a frequency that changes your brainwaves from Delta (Slow) to get you to sleep to Alpha (Fast) so that you have a lucid dream.
      • Very little personal effectiveness; I cant sleep with headphones on and you have to use headphones for these to work. Great for meditation
    • M(nemonic)ILD
      • Note: ILD is always Induced lucid dream
      • Repeating a phrases such as “tonight I will be aware I am dreaming” before you go to bed
      • Supposed to define your intention to your subconscious but I have yet to see it work
    • W(ake)ILD
      • Start from a waking state and remain conscious until dreams start
      • Hardest form of lucid induction, but very effective at creating High Lucidity dreams
      • Meditation & being very tired (but unable to sleep) help with this.
      • Meditation meaning focusing on external stimulants such as sounds and feelings. Then, once you are calm (delta state), focus on internal stimulants such as your breathing or heartbeat. Don’t think, no judgment. Just be aware.
    • D(ream)ILD
      • Already dreaming and then turning the dream into a lucid one
      • Do ‘reality checks’ periodically through the day and eventually you will do them in your sleep and realize you are dreaming.
      • Probably very effective, However; I cannot get into the habit of doing reality checks
      • Keep a dream journal, it helps you remember your dreams
    • Wake Back To Bed (WBTB)
      • If you wake up in the middle of the night stay awake for a few minutes and steadily think about lucid dreaming
      • Personally it works best if I go straight back to sleep and quiet my mind and focus on the black behind my eyelids.
      • Effective, but only if you randomly wake up, I wouldn’t suggest using alarm clocks
    • Ramp Timer
      • Warning: will cause you to be very sleepy. Make sure that you have the next day to catch up on sleep.
      • You can find several programs online or buy one
      • What id does:  You go to sleep. The timer goes off in about an hour. You go back to sleep. It goes of in about 45 mins. It keeps adjusting so that your brain never gets used to the alarm. Eventually it does stop, but I think they last about 2-3hrs. What will happen is you will have a lot of false awakenings and kind of stumble into lucidity as result .
      • Cant really tell you about its effectiveness. Only tried it once- worst night ever- but it  caused me to WILD from being too tired to sleep and just laying there for several hours
    • P(unishment) and R(eward) ILDs
      • Kinda like Pavlov and his dogs, cause yourself to behave a certain way by using rewards and punishments.
      • Every time you go to bed tell yourself something like “if I don’t have a lucid dream tonight, I will have a cold shower” (or something uncomfortable like that, don’t be masochistic with the punishments).
      • Or every time you have a lucid dream reward yourself. Some use chocolate, others use drinks, some even read poetry or listen to music to reward themselves
      • Your brain will associate not having lucid dreams with “cold showers” and being uncomfortable and will give you lucid dreams so it doesn’t have to face that
      • Or Your brain will associate lucid dreams with “chocolate” and rewards
      • Ive only recently heard of this one and cant comment on its effectiveness, however it is very plausible and coincides with behaviorist psychology
  • Stabilizing Dreams
    • If you become too aware in a dream aspects will begin to either fragment, or the whole dream will just fade out.
    • Physical movements
      • Spinning around
      • Rubbing heads together
      • Shaking Head
      • Falling Backwards
    • Shout “increase Lucidity”
      • Somehow its terribly effective; I used it several times in a dream that kept fading out. I even got the dream to fade into another one that was more vivid.
      • Voice commands in general work well. Like “fly” “become invisible” “Make more vivid”
    • Visualization
      • I never found any site mention this and luckily this came naturally
      • Whatever is beginning to fade out, visualize what it looked like beforehand
      • Even if its just a part of the dream (like someone’s face) it will stabilize the whole dream
    • Meditation
      • Not necessarily a dream stabilizer because the current dream goes away, but stabilizes lucidity
      • Works excellent for nightmares in Low-lucidity dreams and lucidity that is being lost due to emotions (like fear or extreme happiness)
      • Close your eyes and focus on your heartbeat. The dream will fade out and another will enter and you will have another dream. However you must have the intent to stay lucid
  • Cool things to try while lucid
    • Changing environment
    • Meeting people
    • Talking to dream characters about yourself
    • Meditating
    • Magic/drinking potions (great scapegoat for flying and powers)
    • Teleport
    • Flying
    • Mind control

Bedtime

A scream

A shout

So loud

So inaudiable

Thoughts chatter

Eyes flicker

 

Places far away

Places oh-so near

Faces i had always known

Faces i had never met

Ideas endless

and I restless

 

Things that always were

Things that I wish to see

A love in the finer things

A love for these eyelid plays

No dreams

No quieting 

 

Jobs I wish i had

Jobs I cannot have

Romance under the stars

Romance without any cause

Slowing down

Less Sound

 

A peace this is

The kind in between thoughts

The quieting of sounds

The distance between words

 

A

heartbeat

No 

Sound

 

Breathe

In

Breathe

out

 

And finally the sound i wish to hear: